Sunday, July 5, 2009

Our 4th of July

Ryan decided he had to join in the fun of "being sick" even though he already is, and had us up the night before the 4th, having thrown up in his bed... yuck. I didn't know he could even throw up still, but the tell tale signs were all there. Luckily he didn't drop his O2 sat, but it is likely that he aspirated into his lungs. So, we were on watchful eye for ANY sign of distress today.

4th of July was very different this year. Most years, I can remember spending a lot of the day preparing food, enjoying the outdoors and complaining about the hot sun. This year, it was gloomy and rainy and we spent very little time outdoors. It wouldn't have seemed like the 4th at all if it hadn't been for the fireworks going off around us. Ryan was very fussy all morning, having to be put down for a short nap at 10 am that turned into a 5 hour nap! Our first indication that he was still not feeling well. When he got up, he was still quite irritated, but we did our best to keep him happy and awake.

Sara, Nathan and Ian came over to have dinner with us. We cooked shrimp skewers on the BBQ and had cantaloupe, broccoli, bread and baked potatoes. The meal was great and we enjoyed sitting down together to celebrate.

And then, our 4th of July blew up... Ryan woke up from his short nap just after we sat down. Chris went and got him from his room and brought him out to join us. He layed him on his side in his bouncy chair as we often do and sat back down. **We usually only have Ryan's sat monitor on while he sleeps, but when Chris got him up, he was in the lower 90's which is unusual for him, so Chris chose to keep it on him. A few minutes later, Ryan sounded "gurgly" so I got up to get his suction machine to help him out. As I walked past him, I saw the O2 sat machine said 85. I began to run... When I came back, Ryan had already drifted down to the 70's, lower than I had ever seen him go. He was fading fast. I quickly suctioned his nose and mouth, changed his position, trying to get his sat to come up. No change. Someone went to get his cough machine (which we had received just 2 days ago) and I tried suctioning and repositioning agian, no change... 70 and dropping... And then Ryan's color began to change to a dusky gray. We used the cough machine 2 times and got the Wing's nurse on the phone.

As I was talking to her, we suctioned him again and gave him the medication to relax him. Approx 10 minutes had passed and we were unable to get his sat above 85. We used the cough machine once more and prayed that he would begin to recover. His sat finally reached 93 and we let him rest for a few moments before moving him to the couch. He was very upset and moaning through the whole event and I sat next to him and held his hand and talked to him until the medication began to work. His heartrate finally settled down from 170's to 140's and he opened his eyes to look around. It took approx. 20 minutes for his normal color to return even after his O2 sat was normal. We were all exhausted.

After spending some more time on the couch, we were finally ready to put him to bed and pray that the rest of the night was uneventful. We were instructed to continue to give him the relaxing medication every 6 hours for the next day or so, especially if he seemed uncomfortable. Kathy, the Wing's nurse, thought we were going to have a rough night and said that if this happened again, we needed to decide if we would consider taking a trip to the ER for a chest x-ray or if we were satisfied with treating him the best we can at home. Since a chest x-ray is only diagnostic and we have all of the equipment and "machines" we are willing to help Ryan with at home, we knew a stressful trip to the ER wasn't the answer.

We tried our best to shake off what had just happened and prayed that he would remain stable the rest of the night. After a few tears, we cleaned up the dinner dishes, got the kids to bed and the four of us sat down to play a game. Sara and I went outside to watch a few of the fireworks that our neighbors were setting off and to smell the sulfur in the air, a trademark of the 4th of July. My heart wasn't there and not much of me was interested in celebrating...

Luckily, Ryan was stable the rest of the night. When he woke up this morning, he was still pretty fussy, so we followed the nurse' recommendation and did give him the relaxing medication. It made his and our day much more enjoyable. Bittersweet though. It just goes to show that he DOES need more help than he used to. Right now, he is fast asleep for his afternoon nap. As the day goes on, I find myself wondering when our next emergency will be. Each day, it seems to happen when I least expect it.

And on top of everything else, Charlotte threw up in her bed again last night, and now Mommy is sick too! Chris is doing his best to ward off the tummy bug germs, I hope he can do it. We need someone healthy!

The Hawns

1 comment:

amyfish said...

You must be so incredibly exhausted~physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. It's hard to get YOU caught up and filled up on the things YOU need. I want you to know I am praying for healing, peace and strength beyond what you could ever imagine. I know that I have NO IDEA what you are going through, but I do know pain on deep levels. I would really suggest for you to strongly pray about some counseling. I think that I would lose my heart, mind and soul going through what you go through on a daily basis. I wouldn't share this with you, except that God has been putting it on my heart a lot lately and I know that if I don't listen to Him, He will only keep it on my heart and mind until I do. I have just sensed from reading your blog that you desperately need someone to give you wisdom and tools to keep you as strong as you can be and to help you go through the grief and pain you are going through. I think that family and friends are great, but you and your husband need more than they can offer. God has always encouraged us to seek out counsel and wisdom and I think He knew that it's because we can't do it all on our own and He has offered us human helpers to help us understand or at least cope with what He has allowed our trials in this life to be. I hope that you are not offended. I only offer up this in great humbleness and an out pouring of love from my heart for you and your family. Our prayers are with you. Our hearts ache with you. We are bearing your burden with you and casting it all to the Lord on your behalf. God Bless you Jenn and give you the strength you need for each moment of each day.
Amy and Family